My hand turned me down
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
did i just pee glitter
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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