As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Randomize