Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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