The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize