at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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