I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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