I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
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