Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
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He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
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All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
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