The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to sanitize my soul.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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