Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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