then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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