her vagine was all disorganized.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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