your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize