so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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