his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize