im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize