My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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