Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
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