hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
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After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
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If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
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