i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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