That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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