i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize