last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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