i jhust puked up my retainher.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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