oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
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please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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