chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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