Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
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I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
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