Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize