i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
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