i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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