I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
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Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
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So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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