just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
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Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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