My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
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