just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize