How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize