I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize