She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize