The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
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I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
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We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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