Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
We are two peas in an std pod
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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