Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
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i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
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I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
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