Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize