Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
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who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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