On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
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