i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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