I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
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Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
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i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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