He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize