Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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