I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
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Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
My bed is full of blood and feathers
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
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The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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