i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
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