What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
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